You've successfully subscribed to Kick Health Blog
Great! Next, complete checkout for full access to Kick Health Blog
Welcome back! You've successfully signed in.
Success! Your account is fully activated, you now have access to all content.
Success! Your billing info is updated.
Billing info update failed.
Adam, Musician: "I Make the Space on Stage My Own"

Adam, Musician: "I Make the Space on Stage My Own"

Growing up, I always wanted to be a musician. But the idea of people hearing me play triggered a sense of insecurity within me. I was too caught up in wondering what people would think of my playing: Do they think I sound ok? Did they catch that last mistake? Are they just counting down the minutes until I’m off stage?

So I made it a point to never perform in front of anyone who I knew was listening to me. I would pick jobs where I knew people weren’t really listening to me like as a ballet pianist or playing jazz in restaurants.

It got to the point of where, if I really wanted to play, I needed to overcome those ‘not good enough’ voices in my head. So I started playing as an accompanist in a church. The churchgoers were very forgiving towards any mistakes I made. Each week I played there I gained bit more confidence, softening the inner critic and becoming less afraid.

Now I see stage fright as a state of intensity rather than a fear, something that I can train myself to face.

I prepare myself for the intensity by making it a point to always count when I play 1,2,3,4…1,2,3,4…’– the only time I let up on counting is when I perform. It’s helped me to feel less afraid when there’s a little extra going on in mind, like in situations where I have nervous thoughts.

When I perform, I try and make the space on stage my own. I’ll move the piano bench just a little before I sit down. I make it my space, own it so that me being there is an intentional act. Just make it my space, so that I feel like I have a right to be there. Then, I can focus on enjoying being there and doing my job, rather than worrying about whether or not I sound great.